Sombrero

Yolanda and Chris went with me to Chevy's in Times Square. I've been dying lately to go to Chevy's for some reason, but no one would go with me! So I practically had to coerce the two of them to accompany me - I just didn't want to be alone eating a smothered burrito in Times Square that night. We had a meal that was okay (why don't I ever remember that the food at Chevy's is just okay?), and then Yolanda tried to get me a free dessert by telling the waitress that it was my birthday. The waitress said she couldn't get me a free dessert, but she brought me a sombrero. It was a nice sombrero, and we were convinced that it was a "house sombrero" that couldn't leave Chevy's. But then our waitress said it was mine to keep! Hurray! "Yes," she said. "Most people just take some pictures with it and then leave it behind in the restaurant. But it's for them to keep!" Instantly, in my mind's eye, the sombrero had been worn and discarded by countless Chevy's customers who were confused about whether or not the sombrero was a gift or a temporary loan, and it was by now infested with bed bugs and scabies. But then I reminded myself that scabies and bed bugs, really, would have to "get in line" to ruin my life, as it were. I wore the sombrero home, expecting at any moment to be jumped. But the good thing about having a birthday the same week as Halloween is that no one will jump you for wearing a sombrero on October 28. I walked into my apartment and threw it on the floor, and there it sits still.